Month: August 2015

Deepest Fear

“Our deepest fear is that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.

We as ourselves: “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?”

Actually, you are not to be? You are a child of God.

Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.

There’s nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us: it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 

As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

– Nelson Mandela

Such wise words to reflect upon, as spoken by an incredibly wise man. 

There is much to be said about fearing our light, more than darkness. Think about it for a moment: how many people get stuck in a rut of darkness and depression? More than should be, that is for certain. On the other hand, how many people shine? Even when we see someone ‘shining’ they are struggling with fear. Quite a complex cunundrum. 

For some reason, it is incredibly easy to slide backwards, into a hole of despair. It is also extremely comfortable for some to stay in that state, as well. 

Making changes can be uncomfortable, especially changes that bring someone from that darkness, into the light. So many fears, whether unfounded or not, obscure goals and prevent necessary change from ocurring. That fear can completely paralyze a person, and create irreversible consequences.

The consideration to give would be to step outside of that fear and self-evaluate. Is the fear truly justified (e.g. surviving a horrific car accident, and later being afraid to travel in a car), or is it something the mind has created as a blocking mechanism; an impedement that slows, and can ultimately stop someone from leading a normal life?

There are times when it is necessary to seek the advice of a healthcare professional, or therapist. Those are very viable means of learning to control fear, and getting back onto a healthy path. There are other times when it takes a few, dedicated moments, hours, or even days of careful introspection, to solve the puzzle and realize the bigger picture.

For those less ensnared by fear, even little nuisances can create barriers and inhibit progress on more of a minimal scale. Even so, the impact still rings true: preventing the occurance of positive change.

Pesky granules of fear stimy the ability to shine. May seem strange, but even the most talented, brilliant and courageous (yes, courageous) human beings have struggled with fear, in a way that would be best construed by definition of the phrase ‘tortured soul.’

There is a need to face our fears, regardless of size, and learn to work thru them. They are put before us as a learning tool; a way to navigate life, and appreciate the beauty and blessings set before us. Our (seemingly) personal fears can also help others. The amount of light cast from a light source (your soul’s shining light), is still light, and can be built upon. That light serves as a beacon to usher crippled souls to a safe harbor.

Facing fear, and testing your light can be a daunting thought and task, but is an enormous accomplishment, and source of empowerment for others who observe your progress. Facing your fears – and tackling them – is one of the biggest testaments of character that equates to a super-intoxicating and addictive drug for the human soul.

Others who observe the steps you take to evaluate (introspection), tackle (self-process, seek counseling, therapy and/ or medication management), and in turn, shine, will be inspired. Just as Mandela stated, “As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Yes, the short version is; it’s that’s simple.

Allow yourself to say good riddance to the fear-driven, tormented soul, and allow yourself to thrive. Don’t sit in the shadows with the curtains pulled shut tight; open them wide and be you. 

Be you; embrace all of your weird, colorful, quirky, silly ways. Employ your unshackled soul with respectful abandon. In turn, your light will help others who have wilted, or struggled in fear-riddled darkness, gain confidence to grow alongside you.

Evaluate. Embrace. Employ. Empower.

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The Healing

We all grieve differently – and that is something to keep in mind. The same applies to the duration of that grief. 

When it comes to deep love, we never truly recover from a loss, but we do gain wisdom. That knowledge comes from a private place within our heart and soul, which over time, pieces together a healing.

‘The healing’ is an experience that can take the rest of a lifetime, and should not be expected, or rushed. It takes time.

During times of tragedy and sorrow, we must find strength in those around us, more so, when we share a loss. Comfort and compassion shared is an invaluable blessing that provides hope, even in what seems to be the darkest of hours.

You may be better equipped to handle a crisis, or loss, than someone you know. In turn, your approach is perceived to be strong. A common deception, although not intentional most times, the outwardly appearing ‘strong’ individual may be silently falling apart on the inside.

On the other hand, there are others who act-out, and for whatever reason, have difficulties filtering, or handling their emotions. To some, these people are perceived weak, or emotional – sometimes irrational.

The bottom line is: every human being grieves in their own way. Weak, or strong, the commonality is a connection based upon love. 

Look around and try to understand what is seen, as well as unseen. There is no right, or wrong way to grieve. There is also no time limit to how long one grieves. Quite frankly, grief is both very personal, and considerably selfish.

We can be of great spiritual help to one another at different points in our lives, and that is what makes the wisdom we achieve while healing, so important. We must remember that we are both teachers, as well as students. 

The strong can help the weak, and the weak can help the strong. Rather than let sorrow isolate you, or cause you fear, allow it to draw you to others who you can help, and who can help you. Every moment, be it good, or bad, is part of the healing.

As someone who knows; death is much harder on the living. Try not to let it cause so much strife and chaos in your life that you lose focus of what is most important: the memory of your loved one, and life, itself.

Celebrate the life of your loved one. Celebrate you. Celebrate life, and heal.